News from Annapurna: As the German embassy in Kathmandu reported to the headquarters of the Federal Office for Magical Creatures in Bonn, there was recently an accident with a yeti at Annapurna Base Camp due to snow blindness.
POKHARA/BONN (BAfmW) – What began as a peaceful morning in the Himalayas ended in a fur and tent massacre. On Tuesday, a full-grown yeti – yes, THE legendary snowman – swept through the Annapurna base camp like a fluffy hurricane. The result: four demolished tents, a broken gas stove battery and at least 50 missing protein bars.
But the real sensation: the Yeti was not out to make a ruckus, but… blind as a bat in a snowstorm!
“I thought it was an earthquake or an avalanche,” says German extreme mountaineer Karl-Heinz “Kalli” M. (48), describing the dramatic scenes. “But then I heard this humming, like a mixture of Chewbacca and my father-in-law after three beers. And suddenly HE was standing in front of me. With a crazy look, but without any orientation.”
“He had no idea which way was up and which way was down!”
Yeti with snow blindness (Photo: ChatGPT)
Witnesses report that the Yeti stumbled staggering through the camp, first tried to put on a tent like a jacket and then talked to an ice axe for several minutes – presumably because he thought it was an old friend.
“The beast sat down on my sleeping bag and just started crying,” says British woman Chloe R. (31), still visibly in shock. “That’s when I knew it wasn’t an aggressive monster. It’s a snowball with feelings.”
Cause of the chaos: snow blindness!
What took away the Himalayan hooligan’s vision was not drug intoxication, but simply snow blindness – a treacherous corneal inflammation caused by extreme UV radiation at altitudes above 5,000 meters.
“Many Yetis underestimate the danger of snow blindness,” explains Dr. Pemba Sherpa, an expert on rare mountain fauna. “The reflective snow cover acts like a solarium on speed. You can’t do anything without goggles.”
According to the latest findings, up to 80% of all Himalayan Yetis suffer from UV damage at some point in their lives. Protective measures? Not a chance. “Oakley sunglasses on credit? The banks up here will laugh at you,” says Sherpa.
“I just wanted to ask for directions…”
The victim himself showed remorse – at least according to the interpreter, who specializes in communicating with mythical creatures:
“I just wanted to ask if this is the way to Kathmandu. But then… everything is white. Everything is blinding. I just felt something, and it must have been tents.”
After his emotional statement, the yeti burst into tears, ate the rest of his muesli bar and disappeared back into the fog – accompanied by a slightly unnerved Sherpa who had promised to get him a pair of sunglasses.
Now comes the rescue: #Shadesforyeti!
Snow goggles in a suitable size for a Yeti
The survivors immediately launched the #ShadesForYeti campaign to prevent such disasters caused by snow blindness in yetis in the future. Goal: Collect donations to equip all Yetis in the Himalayas with UV protection. The first sponsors are said to have already taken the bait: a well-known outdoor eyewear manufacturer and a luxury brand that has discovered “fur-wearing influencers” as a new target group.
It is unclear whether Yeti will take off as a testimonial on Instagram in the future. Rumor has it that he is planning a TikTok channel entitled “Blind Dates on the Mountain”.
Until then, there is only one hope for the mountaineering community: that no other snow-blind giant comes up with the idea of doing yoga at base camp of all places.