Dr. Irmintraut-Huberta Blitze-Wölklein, born on September 30, 1956, in the Bavarian town of Oberpatschenknallbach an der Knatter, comes from a Franconian family of teachers whose pedagogical influence manifested early in a pronounced inclination toward structured thinking, normative reflection, and sustained willingness to engage in discussion.
She completed her schooling in Bremen, where she first attended primary school, then secondary school, and ultimately obtained her Abitur. Even at this stage, she demonstrated a particular affinity for questions of social theory as well as a pronounced willingness to subject existing orders to critical re-evaluation.
Afterwards, she completed training for the higher administrative service at the University of Applied Sciences for Public Administration in Offenbach, which she successfully finished. In parallel with this training, she began a distance-learning programme in the subjects of queer-feminist biology, discursive theories in sociology, and women’s studies at the Faculty of Post-Structuralist Interpretation of Nature at the Unseen University of Ankh-Morpork. This programme spanned a total of 36 semesters and was characterised by continuous thematic deepening as well as remarkable perseverance in addressing theoretical questions.
Award of the Dr. phil. h.c. to Irmintraut-Huberta Blitze-Wölklein
Within the framework of these studies, Blitze-Wölklein undertook a doctoral attempt entitled “The Y Chromosome as an Error of Evolution—An Intersectional Analysis of Patriarchal Molecular Structures.”
Although it was not possible to empirically verify the central thesis in full, the work was ultimately honoured with the academic degree Dr. phil. h.c. Decisive factors were, in particular, the extraordinary duration of the scholarly engagement and the sustained acquisition of third-party funding.
After entering public service, Dr Blitze-Wölklein held various positions before ultimately transferring to the Federal Office for Magical Beings (BAfMW). There, over the course of her career, she assumed increasingly responsible roles and was most recently appointed Head of Department 9. In parallel, she served as Commissioner for Equality and Gender Affairs.
In these roles, she focused in particular on the conceptual development of gender-related administrative approaches, the integration of diverse identity concepts, and the critical reflection of existing administrative structures. Her work was characterised by a high level of commitment and a consistent focus on enforcing her professional convictions.
Colleagues consistently described her as an activist determined to pursue matters to their utmost conclusion, who did not shy away from unusual forms of protest. In a widely noted incident, as part of a symbolic action against patriarchal structures, she attempted to glue herself to her office chair; however, for technical reasons this could only be implemented in part.
Missing After Retirement in the Blitze-Wölklein Memorial Hall
After her retirement, the Federal Office for Magical Beings honoured her services in a special way by renaming the entire 32nd basement level of the agency building “Irmintraut-Huberta-Blitze-Wölklein-Memorial-Hall”. At the same time, she was tasked with producing a gender-inclusive translation of early Hittite tax tables on cuneiform tablets from the chancellery of the Great King Šuppiluliuma I.
To carry out this project, the entire 32nd basement level was made available to her for her sole use. Since then, Dr Blitze-Wölklein has no longer appeared in regular operations, which, however, has nothing to do with the masonry crew sent to the 32nd basement level by master builder Willi Kaczmarek. In fulfilment of its responsibility towards (former) female employees, the Office has formed a committee to clarify the events, which is to appoint a working group to deal with the whereabouts of Blitze-Wölklein. For scheduling reasons, the committee members have not yet met.
In recognition of her unique standing within the agency, it was decided not to fill the position of Commissioner for Equality and Gender Affairs again after her departure. In this context, a rumour persists within the agency that this decision is the result of an internal petition signed by all employees and accepted by the agency management and the staff council.
Following this decision, an extensive and exceptionally exuberant internal Christmas party (with strippers!) is said to have taken place, the precise details of which are not subject to official documentation, but which is described in informal accounts as having unusually high participation and festive atmosphere.
Dr Irmintraut-Huberta Blitze-Wölklein thus remains a figure whose work at the Federal Office for Magical Beings was shaped both by lasting structural impulses and by a series of extraordinary individual events. Her name is inextricably linked to a specific phase of the agency’s development, the effects of which remain evident in organisational and cultural terms.
